Barbie’s Baggage in Madrid

“Why does your suitcase …. um, vibrato?”

The woman at the check-in counter tore her hand from my bag as if she had just burned it.

I thought she was joking.  I had just emptied most of my suitcase’s contents on the airport floor to transfer some of my stuff to Hubby’s bag because mine was over the weight limit for domestic flights.  As much as I have traveled, packing has never been my strength.

In fact, it’s the one part of travel I actually dread. 

I don’t really see what the big deal is.  What’s so unreasonable about packing eight pairs of shoes for an eight night trip?  And anything can happen with weather … if I hadn’t packed those sweaters for this 90 degree+ weather I’m sure I would have needed them.

I’ve struggled with packing too much for so long now that I even bought a smaller suitcase especially for this trip:

My overpacked Barbie-bag

I call it my Barbie Bag.  It’s one of those supposedly ultralight/ultrasturdy new designs, but I really bought it because I figured I would never lose it at the airport.

Which is true.

Especially now that my bag is vibrating and humming so strongly at the check-in counter that everyone (including me!) is afraid to touch it.  Did someone manage to sneak a bomb in there?  What does a bomb even look like?  (And why wasn’t I paying attention all those years ago when I dated that crazy bomb squad guy?)

“Perhaps is cell phone?”  the airline girl offers.

But my phone is in my purse, and it’s not even charged.  So, for the second time, I dump my suitcase contents on the airport floor.  And everyone stares at my eight pair of shoes, four handbags, too many books, six dresses, gazillion pair of panties …

and then I find it.

Oh Crap.

It’s Sambo, happily vibrating away at top speed in his elegant silk bag.

What?  Don’t tell me you’ve never named a vibrator before.

Or packed one.

I don’t think I even meant to bring it.  He must have jumped into the bag himself … he sure chose a fun way to announce his presence to the entire Spanish population.

At least we made our flight to Madrid.  That’s what counts, right?

And right now as I’m blogging, I’m supposed to be packing because we leave for home early tomorrow morning.

But I’m procrastinating just a little because who knows what else might sneak into my bag this time?

Have YOU ever been embarrassed while traveling?  At what point did it become a funny story?  Tell me ALL ABOUT IT …